Recently, I had a prospect I work with in a bind. He had one college soccer program offer him a spot with a deadline date and it was a solid option for him. But the school he really wants to attend and play at wasn’t ready to offer him. He was late getting on their list and there was another player that the school knew more ahead of him for the spot at his position. Additionally, the coach was going to try to utilize the transfer portal at the end of spring to see if he can bring in some immediate impact, older and more experienced guys.
So the client had to decide what to do as the deadline approached. Does he turn down what is now his only remaining offer to play college soccer in hopes of things working out at his dream school or does he take the safe option and go to the school that is his No. 2, a school where he has a guaranteed opportunity?
After consulting with me, my advice to him was to take the offer at your No. 2, but don’t go blasting your commitment on social media or even telling people outside of your family. This might give the coach at your No. 1 school time to get through his process and if he still likes you, you leave the door open to the chance of landing there. If that ends up becoming a reality, he can “rescind” his commitment to playing at his No. 2 school and commit to his No. 1. By not going public with his original commitment, this is an easier transition. When the family heard this, they felt that this didn’t feel right or was ethical. In all honesty, they’re not wrong and I understand where they are coming from with this position.
A few years ago, your word was your word, but now, with the transfer portal, it seems players from teams are leaving every year and trying to find greener pastures. Loyalty is pretty much a thing of the past and, unfortunately, student-athletes aren’t even loyal to their own program and coach anymore in college. If you asked me if this was okay to do a few years back, I would have said “no”, but the landscape has changed.
Don’t be naive to think that coaches aren’t doing this too. If a coach isn’t trying to out-recruit their current roster every year, they aren’t trying to win. Coaches are trying to get players better than you every year. They are even asking players that aren’t meeting their expectations to leave their programs to free up roster spots and/or scholarship money. It’s starting to become the norm that college players won’t compete at one school for all four years, all thanks to the transfer portal.
If both schools need deposits to hold the spot, I might even consider depositing to both to hold my spot. I’m an amateur ethicist, but I’ll share this. I believe that your highest ethical duty is to your family and to keep them safe and do what is best for them. To me, that’s first and way higher up the depth chart than a college coach and/or admissions office you have known for a few months, or maybe even less. Things change and you need to protect yourself and give you and your family the best chance at a strong future, both athletically and academically. Coaches are used to this by now and might be upset for a moment if you change your mind, but the fact is, this is the way college athletics works now.
Let’s flip back to my client and his situation.
Just this past week, they received an offer to play at their No. 1 school. Because they heeded my advice, the only person they had to tell that they changed their mind was the coach at their No. 2 school. They kept everything close to their chest and now they are landing their top choice that seems to be a better fit for their priorities.
While I can’t say with 100% certainty, I have to imagine that the other coach quickly moved on to the next recruit on his list, whether that be a high school athlete or someone in the transfer portal.
Do you think this was a good move? It worked out, but was it unethical? I’m curious to hear your thoughts! Feel free to reply and let me know what you think you would do if you found yourself in this situation.